Getting what YOU want.

People (in general) these days don’t seem to know what they really want.

Or rather they DO know what they want, but they’ll never do anything to achieve what they desire because they fear someone else’s disapproval.

Take this example:

Jason loves horror movies, and every time he goes out with his friends he wants to watch a scare inducing film.

But because his friends ONLY like in-depth dramas, he decides to watch dramas with them instead of his preferred horror movies (all while being bored to tears).

Now if Jason likes horror movies, why doesn't he watch horror movies?

Because his friends have a completely different taste, and the one suffering is him, as he’s pretending to be someone he’s not.

He’s doing what his “friends” want, not what HE himself wants.

Well news flash Jason, there are other people who enjoy horror films as well. I suggest you find them and become friends.

Your new hangout sessions will be SIGNIFICANTLY more enjoyable. In fact you can easily make a friend who enjoys the same activities as yourself just by conversing with people who are at whatever event it is you enjoy.

Do what you love.

If you like rock climbing, but all your friends are too pussy for it, that means they are holding you back from your potential adventure and fun.

Go for rock climbing events anyways (by yourself if nobody else wants to come), and make friends at those events.

You’ll find your new rock climbing buddies a lot more fun to hang around than your other friends who don’t approve or enjoy your passions in life.

It’s so easy to get to know people at specific events as well, because you are both already there for basically the same reasons, you have that in common to start with already!

Stop throwing away your enjoyment for the sake of fitting in.

If you’re a weirdo, then go be with other weirdos, and soon enough you’ll realize that you are not weird at all; you’re just different from your old friends.

SCREW IT!

I used to be really quiet and docile, and that’s how my friends were as well.

They didn't approve of randomly talking to people and attempting to make friends with strangers as it was “WEIRD” to them.

So for a long time I conformed to fitting in with these “friends” of mine, continued to be a quiet sad little boy. Every time I saw someone interesting walk by I had the urge to talk to them, but social norms dictated that I would be a weirdo if I did.

Then one day I decided to screw what my “friends” thought, because if they didn’t like the REAL me, then they’re not worth having as friends anyways.

Then do it.

I started talking to strangers whenever I saw someone that caught my eyes, and a couple things happened.

First, my so called friends thought I was really weird and didn’t want to be seen around me.

You know the whole “Oh let’s pretend we don’t know him” routine.

Secondly, some of the strangers I talked to ALSO thought I was really weird.

But most importantly, I met an amazing bunch of people just by being a little weird.

I made a new group of friends, and REAL friends this time, by just complimenting strangers whenever they passed by.

Gains for dayz!

Some of these strangers grew to be my closest friends, some got weirded out by me, but it didn’t matter. I was doing what I wanted to do for once.

All my new friends were also into being extremely sociable, which meant we spent lots of time talking to more strangers together, developing conversation styles that best suited us,

becoming amazing speakers, and gaining the ability to take every opportunity with a stranger that a regular person just wouldn't be able to do.

I mean you see the most beautiful girl you’ve seen in your life waiting in line at a Starbucks, the normal person’s reaction would be to do nothing, because it would be “awkward” to randomly talk to her.

What me and my new social friends would do, is walk up and compliment her confidently. From there we could converse and have a great time with a complete stranger!

In fact, that was how I met my first long term girlfriend! I was walking in the mall with some friends when I saw her walk by. A complete stranger, that looked gorgeous.

I had the urge to compliment her. And I allowed myself to do what I wanted to do (instead of being affected by other people’s judgements) and I walked up to her to compliment her.

We were together for 3 years, and while the relationship eventually came to an end, it was definitely an experience of a lifetime.

All from being a little “weird”.

But you don’t want to be a weirdo!?

Actually, after meeting so many people who were like me in terms of wanting to be extremely sociable, I realized that it wasn't weird at all anymore!

And my new group of friends actually found it weird when people WOULDN’T do or say what they wanted to say in fear of other people’s reaction.

It became a norm to be explosively social, and it became really weird/lame to be “normal”.

This extends far beyond just being social; this applies to everything in life.

If YOU like something, there are GOING TO BE other people who like that same thing too. The trick is just finding those people.

If you got any questions, or have something you enjoy that you think nobody else could possibly enjoy, feel free to message me, I’ll get back to you as soon as I can :)

Your task.

I'd like you to write down on a piece of paper describing what you really want, and then go and take active steps towards getting what you want!

Til next time!

- Zacke